End of vacation and start of a new fascinating life

"If you keep my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have kept my Father's commands and remain in his love." John 15:10

I just got back from Drummond Island today. That was one of the best weeks of my life. we went kayaking, canoeing and fishing. The cottage we stayed at had a canoe and a rowboat. Both of which were quite the work out. I never knew how much I liked fishing. I definitely learned patience with fishing because fish don't just pop up and eat your worm automatically. I fished with a bobber and off the bottom. I feel very proud of myself because I caught fish both ways. Of course they were big fish. Only like maximum of 5 or 6 inches long but that's ok. A fish is a fish. Being with 6 other people for an entire week in a little cottage can take a toll of you for sure. I definitely learned patience with my siblings during this time. Especially when we went canoeing. Canoeing is a 2 person sport, you gotta row together. I lost my patience a few times when I went canoeing with my sister and we were going every which way in the water and were never in sync.

Before we left for this marvelous vacation my siblings and I got bloodwork done to see if we had factor V leiden which is a blood clotting disorder. it's a genetic mutation where your blood clots more than it should and you are more prone to blood clots than the average person. The interesting thing is that it is only in 5% of the European/Caucasion race. I found that quite fascinating. Anyways, my mom called the doctor while we were on vacation and the results were that my older brother, my younger brother and I all have factor V leiden. My mom has factor V leiden and it's hereditary so it wasn't a shock that at least one of us would have it. Our chances of inheriting it were 50/50. So half of us kids got it and half didn't. Before we got the results I was praying that I wouldn't have it because it can get really complicated for girls especially. Being a girl and having factor V leiden means that you can't take estrogen or any birth control whatsoever because of the blood clotting risks and girls are more prone to miscarry their babies too, and the pregnancies are more high risk than the average person's. So that's that. I don't really have to alter my life in any way, I just can't sit for long periods of time like on long car rides or on long air plane rides. I have to move my legs around to keep the blood flowing. I can do that. Not that I wanted to have this disorder but I kind of feel special because only 5% of other white/european people have it. That's not a lot. I am thankful that I have this disorder and not a terrible life-threatening disorder. I feel like God is going to use this factor V leiden to draw me nearer to Him and to make a difference in the world somehow.

On another note, Summer is almost over! waaaa. I move into my house in mt. pleasant on august 18 and I'm super excited! I'm going to work the week before school starts and get some money, get all situated and chill before this junior year begins. I'm a junior. wow. That sounds sooo old when in actuality, I'm not old at all. I'm turning 20 in October. Woooo. Finally getting out of these teen years. They seem to last forever.

Besides all that, I'm going to enjoy the rest of this summer and make a difference somehow, someway.

leadership, swimsuits and the future

"The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in want." Psalm 123:1

It's almost July already, which means that summer is pretty much almost done. It's gone by sooooo fast, I can't believe it. My online class is done (finally). I ended up passing thanks to Jesus. There's no way I would have passed this class without Him. PTL. Recently, I've been debating whether or not I want to be in the choir this coming year at His House. I'm still not sure. I've been praying about it, but I'm still waiting for an answer from God. I wasn't sure I'd be able to handle living in one of the church houses along with being in the choir. That would take up a lot of time and commitment. I feel like if I'm not involved in the Church someway other than just going to church and living in the house that I will drift away from God and I don't want that. Then, today I got a message asking if I wanted to lead a lifegroup this coming year. Whoa baby. I wasn't expecting that. Just when I thought I was going to only go to church on sundays and not be in choir, God swoops in and presents an opportunity. I don't know if I'm cut out to be a leader, let alone a lifegroup leader. I don't know if I could help and lead other college aged girls in their walk with Christ. That's such a huge responsibility and commitment. Why would God present this opportunity. I'm still praying about it and will continue to pray about it because this is a big deal and a big decision to make.
On a different note, We're going kayaking on Sunday! I'm so excited! I love kayaking and I got a cute lil swimsuit so I'm stoked to put that thing on and wear it for the first time ever. I remember last year, my family went kayaking on the 4th of July and this year we're pretty much doing the same thing except it's not taking place on the 4th. That's not important though. I love my family and I feel so blessed to get along with every single one of them and to be able to spend time with them. Well not with all of them because we're all on different paths of life now. Jake's getting married this year so he doesn't only spend time with us anymore. He has future inlaws and his wonderful fiancee. Then Hannah's in Israel right now so we can't really spend time with her. I'm the eldest one at home. I don't feel old though because I'm still a young lil 19 year old. That will change soon though and thank goodness for that. 19 sounds soooo young but 20 sounds much more older.
I should try to embrace my age, I really should, because it is a good thing. I mean I can start my career at a younger age than most and move out at a younger age than most and I'd say that's pretty sweet.
Even though I have 2 years of college left, I've been thinking about the future. Where am I going to live? When am I going to finally get a car? Where am I going to work? so many questions and I don't have an answer for any of those. My plans differ from God's so much of the time so I find it better to not plan at all. God's plans are much much more awesome and better for us than what we can even imagine.

Loving God, Yourself, and Maybe a Spouse

"Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as Christ God forgave you." Ephesians 4:32

Lately I've been on a work out streak because my mom and I joined a gym. I love it. Absolutely love it. When I was a freshman in college I worked out 6 days a week for about an hour or so and I think I was in the best shape of my life. Then sophomore year rolled around. I got a job, I was way busier and it took a lot more effort to get to the gym so that 6 days a week thing didn't work out too well. I just couldn't find the time to work out as lame as that sounds. Anyways, now that it's summer, my mom said, "hey let's join a gym to get in shape for Jake's (my brother) wedding!" I was all for that because I'm a bridesmaid and gotta be able to fit in my dress a couple months from now. So we joined. It's awesome and never busy. My mom and I work out 5 days a week for a little bit over an hour or so and I just love the feeling after I work out. My body feels limber and after just 2 weeks of this gym thing, I can see results and I didn't change my eating habits (but I am starting to now). God tells us to take care of our bodies because they are temples and I'm really starting to do that. I'm trying to not be concerned with the calories and fat burning as much as the fact that God created my body beautifully and wants me to keep it that way. I'm just thankful that God created gyms so that I could work out every part of my body. And I am excited to see my measurements come 2 or 3  months from now to see how hard work pays off. It will be awesome. I'm excited.

New topic. Has anyone ever had a dream about their future spouse? I know I have. I never can remember what their face looks like sadly but I remember little details about him like his hair cut. (as weird as that sounds) I don't know what dreams always mean because I've had some weird dreams but I feel like God gives us dreams to tell us something. Why would I dream about someone who may or may not even exist but never remember what their face looks like? I think in this instance the Lord is telling me, "leah, I know what's best for you, you don't need any man in your life to be worth something or to be happy. All you need is Me (God)." that is a hard concept to accept sometimes, especially when the world is filled with marriages and relationships. I feel like the more I would want a marriage, the more God would say that I'm not ready, which would be true. As soon as I realize I don't NEED a guy and am completely in love with God and content with only God in my life, God might put a godly man in my life, then again maybe He won't. God does what He wants and I never know what He has planned. I think it's important to know that no one, not anyone will ever know what God's plans are BUT, God's plans are the ultimate plans and are the absolute best. God knows us inside and out. He knows us better than we know ourselves. We can't hide anything from Him. He knows our desires and knows what's best so we shouldn't try to sneak our plans into God's because what we might think would be the best plans ever could be the absolute worst plans ever. We need to let God be in full control of every aspect of our lives. especially our love lives because God created marriage very delicately and the world is twisting it all up and messing it up. We need to look back in the Bible to see how God wants marriage to be like and how he wants singleness to be like and do exactly what it says. For more info, read all of 1 Corinthians 7. Actually, I'll post it....

1 Corinthians 7

Concerning Married Life

7 Now for the matters you wrote about: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.” ² But since sexual immorality is occurring, each man should have sexual relations with his own wife, and each woman with her own husband. ³ The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. ⁴ The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife. ⁵ Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. ⁶ I say this as a concession, not as a command. ⁷ I wish that all of you were as I am. But each of you has your own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that.

⁸ Now to the unmarried^[a] and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I do. ⁹ But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.
¹⁰ To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. ¹¹ But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.
¹² To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. ¹³ And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. ¹⁴ For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.
¹⁵ But if the unbeliever leaves, let it be so. The brother or the sister is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. ¹⁶ How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?

Concerning Change of Status

¹⁷ Nevertheless, each person should live as a believer in whatever situation the Lord has assigned to them, just as God has called them. This is the rule I lay down in all the churches. ¹⁸ Was a man already circumcised when he was called? He should not become uncircumcised. Was a man uncircumcised when he was called? He should not be circumcised. ¹⁹ Circumcision is nothing and uncircumcision is nothing. Keeping God’s commands is what counts. ²⁰ Each person should remain in the situation they were in when God called them.
²¹ Were you a slave when you were called? Don’t let it trouble you—although if you can gain your freedom, do so. ²² For the one who was a slave when called to faith in the Lord is the Lord’s freed person; similarly, the one who was free when called is Christ’s slave. ²³ You were bought at a price; do not become slaves of human beings. ²⁴ Brothers and sisters, each person, as responsible to God, should remain in the situation they were in when God called them.

Concerning the Unmarried

²⁵ Now about virgins: I have no command from the Lord, but I give a judgment as one who by the Lord’s mercy is trustworthy. ²⁶ Because of the present crisis, I think that it is good for a man to remain as he is. ²⁷ Are you pledged to a woman? Do not seek to be released. Are you free from such a commitment? Do not look for a wife. ²⁸ But if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. But those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this.
²⁹ What I mean, brothers and sisters, is that the time is short. From now on those who have wives should live as if they do not; ³⁰ those who mourn, as if they did not; those who are happy, as if they were not; those who buy something, as if it were not theirs to keep; ³¹ those who use the things of the world, as if not engrossed in them. For this world in its present form is passing away.
³² I would like you to be free from concern. An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord’s affairs —how he can please the Lord. ³³ But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world—how he can please his wife— ³⁴ and his interests are divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world—how she can please her husband. ³⁵ I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord.
³⁶ If anyone is worried that he might not be acting honorably toward the virgin he is engaged to, and if his passions are too strong^[b] and he feels he ought to marry, he should do as he wants. He is not sinning. They should get married. ³⁷ But the man who has settled the matter in his own mind, who is under no compulsion but has control over his own will, and who has made up his mind not to marry the virgin—this man also does the right thing. ³⁸ So then, he who marries the virgin does right, but he who does not marry her does better.^[c]
39 A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord. ⁴⁰ In my judgment, she is happier if she stays as she is—and I think that I too have the Spirit of God.

A few weeks into summer

It is now a couple weeks into summer vacation, and I haven't really accomplished much. I'm taking an online class which is a terrible decision on my part because I don't like working on it. I'm not really motivated to teach myself and the class is worth 100 points so there's no room for mess ups unfortunately and more unfortunately, I'm not doing too swift in the class as of right now. Stupid class. Thankfully it will be over in like 4 weeks.
On the other side of things, I recently got a new tat. It's a dove holding an olive branch. I love it. For each of my tats, there is a meaning behind it, a biblical meaning. This one if from Noah and the ark. When there was the flood, Noah sent out a dove a couple times and the final time, it came back with an olive branch. This represents hope and that the Lord will provide for you and that everything will be ok. The dove symbolizes the Holy Spirit and I just love the feeling of having the Holy Spirit with me wherever I go.
On another note, I'm currently sick with a cold or something, I'm not allergic to anything yet (this is getting graphic) when I blow my nose, it is clear, so it must not be a cold. It must be some type of allergies. How can I have allergies if I'm not allergic to anything? That's just my body, always doing weird things....Anyway, we're trying to sell our kittens. All 11 of them but it's been hard. I was informed that there is a ring of people in Grand Rapids who have boa constrictors and feed their snakes kittens and puppies that they pick up for free from people. Of course they lie and say, "Oh we just moved here and have 3 children and they would love some kittens or puppies." That is so terrible. It disgusts me that people would take precious little baby animals and feed them to a snake. Snakes can eat other things. Don't let them eat kittens and puppies. And changing the subject again, I recently have looked at my bank account not trying to freak out but there are just so many expenses. It's terrible. I'm trying to figure out if I'll have enough money to buy books for school, pay rent for fall, and all of that when I know that the Lord will provide. Why do I always forget God? It's silly of me. Why should I worry about anything. Obviously the Lord has provided for me this long so why would He stop? Why would such an awesome and loving God stop providing? I can't believe I'm typing this because I'm speaking to myself at this very moment. Wow.....I think that will be my lesson for today. Trust that God will provide. When a God like ours loves us so much that He would send His Son to die for us, what does that say about Him? Seriously. We have nothing to fear.

"Preserve me, Oh God, for in Thee do I put my trust." Psalms 16:1

Changes

It is currently the week before finals, and everyone is on edge here at CMU. It's "Gentle Thursday" today, but it doesn't seem too gentle to people. I don't get it. I seem to feel very mellow today and quite calm. It's weird. The normal me would probably be freaking out about finals and studying her butt off trying to get that A; however, this semester has been different. I only have 2 real exams and on one of them is open note, so technically, I only have 1 exam. It's so weird. Apparently the Sociology professors here at CMU like take home essays and 10 point presentations more than giving scantron exams. I'm not opposed to this view at all. I actually love my professors for doing that. Oddly, I feel as if I've learned and retained more in the classes that don't have final exams than the ones that do. My Sociology Professors always tell me that they care about what we learn, and can apply to our lives rather than how much we can memorize and forget 1 hour later. I like this. If I ever become a professor in the future, I think I'll take the same approach. I wouldn't want my students studying only to forget it. I want to see what they have learned and how they can apply it to real life situations and their own lives and their future careers.
New topic. I've recently switched my career path. Multiple times. In the span of my 2 years at CMU, I have changed my mind many times. I went from wanting to be a social worker to an ultrasound technician, to a family and marriage therapist to a juvenile probation officer. Why did I change my mind so much? God has been transforming me. My interests have somewhat changed but remained the same. I have become aware that I am supposed to be using the gifts God has given me and I'm just trying to figure out how to do that exactly.
As of now, I want to be a juvenile probation officer. Why? Because I love working with adolescents and teens. I believe anyone can be rehabilitated. I believe anyone can change. Who am I to say that someone should spend the rest of their life in prison? I can't make that call. That's why I am against life in prison and the death penalty. Who am I to say that someone deserves to never be free? Who am I to say that someone deserves death? ONLY and ONLY God can make that call. We can't.
I'm not quite sure how much probation officers make, but I don't see that as the reward anyways. Communicating and working directly with troubled youth is what the Lord is calling me to do. With God, I can make a difference in these teens' lives. I can be a listening ear, and maybe the adult figure they have never known and wanted. I can be a witness. I could love on these teens and show them the Lord's love that maybe they've never seen or known of. I can lead by example.


“Consequently, He is able to save to the uttermost those who draw near to God through Him, since He always lives to make intercession for them."  - Hebrews 7:25

Giving Your Brain a Break

"I will surely bless you and give you many descendants. And so after waiting patiently, Abraham received what was promised." - Hebrews 6:14-15

I really should be studying for the 2 exams I have this week but in the grand scheme of things, that won't matter in Heaven. Yes, Jesus wants me to study and to pass, but with His help I'll get it all done and things will be ok. There's no reason to stress about it. That's my new outlook on things lately - don't stress, things will be ok.

I read that Hebrews verse above today. It totally spoke to me because I was trying to get bumped into a class with no luck and today when I called the department, the lady said she will try to get me in and literally a couple minutes after ending the call, I checked my email and was informed that I got bumped into the class. I was like "Thank you Jesus!" It was so awesome to see God answer prayers even for something as little as that. and then I read the verse. ...waiting patiently, Abraham received what was promised. wow. Good things come to those who are patient and wait in the Lord. That is so cool to me.

Anyways, I've noticed lately that I literally have no time to watch any television and it hasn't bothered me either which is strange. I've been eating, sleeping, breathing, working, going to class, studying, doing homework, and spending time with God. That basically sums up my entire life this semester. And shockingly, I don't necessarily have a problem with that. It is really weird. And if I ever do have time to watch tv, I don't even know what shows are on and I still haven't figured out which channels are what here in mt. p. after being here for almost 2 years. oh my lanta. and to top it off, we don't have a remote, and the bottoms are broken on the tv so you have to use an ink pen that is weirdly stuck in the button holes to change the channel. it's quite a sight to see, but we're all still living.

This post is all over the place because I'm currently on my study break but still kind of trying to study still. I don't know what that would even be called. it's like a half-break. A couple weekends ago I was actually watching tv (there's a shocker) and I was watching The Big Bang Theory. It's quite entertaining I must say. My advice to you would be to watch a couple of episodes. It is very funny and strangely links science and education things with humor. Like in one episode, Sheldon dressed up as the Doppler Effect for Halloween. I find that quite amusing. I never knew what the actual definition of the Doppler Effect until I watched The Big Bang Theory. you see? you can always learn from something.

My leisurely lesson to you would to just take a break from the mundane life that you live. Just sit back and relax and think about Jesus. Think about your blessings and thank God for them. You never know when He might decide that you don't need them. Not that He wants to hurt you, He knows what's best for you and that's sometimes hard to understand. but we are in no way, shape or form wise enough to know what we actually need and how to live our lives without Jesus.

It's good to have what I have

"We can rejoice too when we run into problems and trials; for we know that they help us develop endurance, Endurance develops the strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation."         -Romans 5:3-4

Today I woke up and decided, "I'm going to work out!" That's been my thing lately - working out in the mornings when I can. Class as usual interferes sometimes but 1 workout is better than no workout, right? right. I've discovered recently that I don't watch any t.v. I guess that could be a good thing, but there were so many shows I was looking forward to, and then to not have time to watch them is tragic. I just got done watching The Vampire Diaries, and I have to say, it never fails to entertain me.

My leisure lesson for you would be to do something that you haven't done in a while - whether that's watching an old movie/ t.v. show, or some type of activity, or wearing something that you don't normally wear. I feel like it is a good thing to reminisce about the good days.

My life lesson would be this: be thankful for what you have. Have you ever wondered about all the blessings which you were given? when you think about it, EVERY SINGLE THING is a blessing. clothes, a couch, computer, sight, a life... What would it be like if none of those were given to you? We all know that there's only One who can give and take away. Take time to thank Him for everything.